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Showing posts from 2019

A Look Inside the Mind of an Obsessive Perfectionist

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It’s Saturday.   I have the entire day off and totally open.   I’m exhausted. I worked four double shifts and taught three classes this week. I also managed to find the time to have lunch with three different friends, get a massage and have the tiniest bit of alone time with my Woman. This week I uploaded the fourth episode of my new podcast, bought a ticket to Thailand and paid off my tuition for the YTT I’m taking next month. I should be celebrating right? Well, my perfectionism wants to take all the joy away from me today.   I’m an Aries. A fire sign. We’re known for being extremely self-centered, loud, stubborn and fiery. I believe that if you know the downsides of your zodiac sign, you can live with a little more self-awareness of your flaws and not be such a dick all the time.   When you are a fire sign, it means you want to constantly take action. We literally cannot help it. The second something bothers me, I have to fix it immediately. I notice a w

Finally, Home.

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It's Monday. It's July 1. I'm off work for the day. I have a list of things I could do to be "productive." But I think the thing that would feel best right now, is to sit down and force myself to write a blog post. Do I have any idea what I'm about to write about? Nope. Will I promise myself to publish this post by the end of the day? Yes. Do I break promises due to my obsession with perfection? Yep. Here goes. I've been home for about a week after a pretty long month of traveling. And it honestly feels so good to be home. I've got to say, I'm definitely a creature who loves her comforts and her routines. And I'm also beyond grateful that I get to leave the country so often to feed my soul and explore my universe. I feel like I'm supposed to start writing about how my life changed in Nepal and how I went to Kauai  and had an an re-awakening experience with Mother Earth. Of course, these things are true. W

Hello 2019! I Guess I BLOOMED!

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Photo: Tibet House USA. First week of 2019 here we are.  Damn, you feel good already.  I’m digging you. _________________ I read over my NYE blog from 2018: The Year I BLOOM.   I must say, I fulfilled my own prophecy quite well. My biggest goal was to stop making myself small and to start expressing myself more truthfully through the power of the written word.  I set a goal to write 52 blogs, one blog post a week.  And that did not happen. Which is good.  I wrote and published 26 blogs. Almost exactly half as many, with double the effort.  I learned that when I write something, I like to step away from it for a few days and then come back to it and let it sit with me for some time before I share it with my world.  I published something consistently twice a month and I’m proud of that. I watched my writing improve a lot over the year. I watched my vulnerability deepen. My story telling became more truthful and honest - even when it w